“I want to write a book.”
This is one of those things that can be kind of scary to tell people. “You want to write a… book?” they’ll ask. “About what?” And then what am I supposed to say – “I don’t know”…? Because that’s the God’s-truth-honest-answer: I want to write a book, I just don’t know what it’s about. Yet.
“That can be your first line.” Kyle said. “‘I want to write a book, but I don’t know what it’s about.'” I’d been hesitant to tell him. (And when I say ‘hesitant’, I mean hesitant for about five minutes. It was too exciting NOT to tell him! I’m going to write a book! I think!) But what’s he going to say? I thought. What if he doesn’t believe me? Why WOULD he believe me? What aptitude have I shown that proves I’m capable of WRITING A BOOK?
“You should.” Kyle said. “I think you’d be good at it.”
I’d thought he was going to say, “Hah. Right.” or “Sure – what’s it going to be about? Shoes?” Or worse – the same thing one of my friends had told me years ago when I’d told her I wanted to write a book – “Oh come on, Jenn, you’re not smart enough to write a BOOK.” (True story.) But he didn’t say any of that – he, without hesitation, was SUPPORTIVE.
Which threw all of the excuses that I had lined up “I really think I could do it!” and “I’ll show you!” – well, it threw them right out the window. Because it turns out my fiancé is a supportive, kind human. (Which are two things that you really want in a fiancé.)
So now, here I am, declaring it to you – I want to write a book.
(And before you can say anything, I really think I could do it and I’ll show you.)
The first thing I did to prepare for this new adventure was to go back through all of the old stories that I’d written, and stopped writing, and started writing again over the years in hopes that it would give me some inspiration. This turned out to be a great exercise in self-reflection. I will share with you WHY it’s self-reflecting later, but for now – I’m just going to tell you that there were HUNDREDS of pages of fiction. HUNDREDS. It’s like I’ve had nothing else to do for the last fifteen years.
Below are some of the writings that I’ve started over the years (like from 2007-2015), and stopped. You’ll start to see a common trend.
Story Idea #1 – Girl on a dating website. Lies about… everything.
Story Idea #2 – Girl gets arrested for stealing a boat with her boyfriend. And there was a dead body found in the boat? But they didn’t do it?
Story Idea #3 – Girl goes missing… apparently she liked bagels?
Story Idea #4 – Girl goes missing… doesn’t exist? I don’t know, this was a weird one.
Story Idea #5 – Girl goes into a job interview… and… who knows. Maybe she gets the job? She’s prepared. Sort of. Her mom had to call to make sure she was awake this morning – but beyond that, she can totally nail this.
So, anyway. That’s the new news – I have a loving, supportive fiancé, and I want to write a book. I have attempted and failed several times at the actual writing part (see above). But this time feels different. This time I Googled “How to find a literary agent”, so… baby steps.