My favorite jackets to wear this fall

I am here to return a jacket, I told myself. This is not a shopping trip, this a return-a-jacket trip.



Do you ever have to give yourself pep talks before you walk into *that one* store. For me, that store is Abercrombie & Fitch.



There will be no shopping, I told myself. No browsing. No “looking around for fun”. Looking around is NOT fun when you cannot buy anything – and YOU cannot BUY ANYTHING.



Except maybe a turtleneck sweater, because I’ve been looking for one of those. But anything else – NO.



“Hi there!” The sales girl greeted me as I walked into the store. I had my jacket-to-return in hand. “Something I can help you find?” She asked.



“Nope!” I said, gesturing to the bag in my hand. “Just have a return.” And that’s it. Just a return. No new clothes today, nope, I’m not even going to LOOK at that brown suede jacket that I can see out of the corner of my eye.

Wedding Dress Shopping

I knew that it was time to start wedding dress shopping when people would ask “have you found a dress yet?”, and then seem very concerned for me when I said no.



“Well, you better get on that!” They would tell me.. They. Not just my mom, or my friends – my aunt, my dentist, the lady who does my hair – all of them made me feel like if I didn’t “get a move on it”, I was going to end up buying my dress from the prom section at Macy’s.



So, I got a move on it. I made an appointment at a bridal salon and dragged along two of my friends to watch me parade around in dresses for two hours while they cheered me on by saying things like, “I love that one!” and “You look so skinny!”



It was wonderful. For me, anyway. Probably less so for the girl who worked there as a “bridal consultant” and was assigned to help me get in and out of the dresses.



“I’m really sorry if I flash you,” I said to her, more than once. And then, both times, I flashed her. So I guess it was her lucky day.

On Patience.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it does not argue about kitchen cabinet organization, or how to load the dishwasher “correctly”. It is not proud, it does not grumble about cleaning hair out of the shower drain or throwing out a full carton of expired Almond milk because someone declared that they were going to “start making smoothies for breakfast” and then forgot about it. 



Love is patient. It’s about being patient. The Bible doesn’t really dig into that, it just assumes that you will know how to be patient with someone you love, and you won’t get all pissy just because they forgot to clean the lint trap out of the dryer. 



The lint trap is a hot button issue in our house. Really, the dryer in general is pretty controversial. I won’t get into the politics of “when you should clean out the lint trap” (EVERY. TIME.) or “how many towels you should cram in there before you’re going to break the dryer”, because I know that not everyone agrees with me, and because I’VE never broken a dryer, so I wouldn’t know the answer to that. 

Confessions of A Shopaholic.

“So after we get married, whose bank are we going to use?”



Whose bank are we going to use? Not only do Kyle and I have two separate checking accounts, we have two separate banks. For now. Word on the street is that “married people” have this saying- “It’s not MY money, it’s OUR money.”



Right. But, technically, it is still my money, right?



“Uh…” To say that I hadn’t thought about it would be a lie. I’d thought about it. Of course I’d thought about it. “Mine…” I suggested, “I guess?”



Not like it matters. Eventually he’s going to see how much money I spend on make-up and hair products. Where the bank statement comes from doesn’t really matter.

One Day in San Francisco.

Chick flicks and “fun beach reads” will lead you to believe that couples who go away on vacation together always have a super romantic time. A “romantic getaway” they call it.



I don’t know about you, but when Kyle and I go on vacation – we usually just end up bickering about the traffic, or the crowds, or “what time is check-out?” since SOMEONE always seems to forget that check-out is at 11 – even though “check-out is ALWAYS at 11”, but we probably won’t be ready by then because SOMEONE is still in the bathroom.



Our first trip to San Francisco was…. kind of romantic? I guess? It was romantic when Kyle paid some guy to switch seats on the flight home so that he could sit next to me. In a middle seat. While I used his shoulder as a pillow and spent the entire four hours blowing my nose (because OF COURSE I’d woken up with a sinus infection that morning and proceeded to go through airport security with a box of tissues.) Not only did he opt for a crappy middle seat by his sniffly, disgusting fiancé – he went out of his way to hold my hand and let me rest my head on his shoulder, even though I had snot dripping out of my face. If that isn’t true love, I don’t know what is.

On Hiring A Wedding Planner.

Can you handle planning your own wedding? Of course you can. Which is not to say that it will be “easy” – you’ll need excellent time management skills, a Monica-Gellar-level passion for organization, and a notebook. Kyle and I bought a notebook shortly after we got engaged that we deemed “The wedding notebook” where we were only allowed to write “wedding things”. (Five months later we have two pages scribbled with notes like “Flowers?” and “Music….. guitar? Violin. GUITAR.”)



If you have the time, and you’re “into” it – so, you’re not going to roll your eyes every time someone asks you about your ‘color scheme’ – you can plan your own wedding, no matter how busy you are, even if you have a full time job and you travel and you have a life outside of “wedding stuff”.



“But I’m REALLY busy.” I told Kyle, this is back when I was trying to convince him that we “needed” a wedding planner. “Plus we’re getting married in California – and I’m trying to plan everything from Chicago? I don’t really *know* California. I need to find someone who *knows* California. How else am I going to, like, find a florist and a minister and stuff?”



There’s also Google. But. That’s not as fancy as being able to say that you have “a wedding planner”, now is it?



So we justified our decision to do a destination wedding in California because we were going to find someone “locally” to do all of the planning. She will be the J-Lo in that movie “The Wedding Planner”. (Except she won’t sleep with my fiancé. Is that what that movie’s about? I don’t remember, it’s been awhile.) She will take all of my vendor meetings, respond to all of my emails, be in charge of set-up and tear-down of our decorations, and keep me in check the day-of so I’m not late to my own wedding.



OR maybe she won’t do any of that, and she’ll just forward emails to me from the florist that say “See below”. Because, honestly, I think that’s what a wedding planner actually does.

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